i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
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Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
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Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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