He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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