No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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