I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3pm strippers are depressing
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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