just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
is it fun? or sober?
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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