Who did Billy Mays play for?
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize