All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
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