About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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