Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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