The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
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dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
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You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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