...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Randomize