she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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