My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize