Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
I looked at my own cervix.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
it glows. i had to have it.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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