when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
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