Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
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What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
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he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
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