theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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