my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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