This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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