I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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