fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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