then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
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