Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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