my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize