i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize