I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
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The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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