I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bang-toberfest begins!!
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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