I hope mine doesn't look like that
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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