After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
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