there's paper in my vomit.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
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Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize