he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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