It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize