if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Randomize