I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
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