Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
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