I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
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