Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
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