A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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