Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize