Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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