you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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