Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize