I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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