I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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