the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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