If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
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