the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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