i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
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He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
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