Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
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