Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
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